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Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 | Don't Trust the Witch in Apartment 23

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

Episode 6 ended on a big ol' cliffhanger that left us saying 'WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK' when that Please Stand By screen hit. Then episode 7 came along and said 'OH. You mad about that one!?' and dropped the Please Stand By on an even bigger cliffhanger which answered a bunch of questions, whilst (in true WandaVision fashion) leaving us with a whole bunch more.

It was Agatha all along. [Does the Jive]

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

One thing I tend to forget when it comes to WandaVision is the passage of time from one episode to the next. It's never days, but usually a matter of hours, and I was reminded of that very clearly in the opening moments of this episode, titled Breaking the Fourth Wall. This episode takes place the morning after all that shit went down for Halloween, when Fake Pietro turned up, Billy and Tommy got their powers, Vision ended up breaching the Westview Hex barrier, Wanda then had to expand the Hex to save him and sucked in a whole bunch of S.W.O.R.D agents in the process, along with poor Dr. Darcy. But Wanda and Vision haven't spoken since, and they spend the entire episode apart. Vision is trying to piece together the discoveries that he'd made the night before, whilst Wanda seems to have given up on just about everything as a result of the night before.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

The sitcom style this week is Modern Family, but with an intro sequence based on Happy Endings, with a music theme style based on that of The Office. The Modern Family and The Office are both well known sitcoms of the 2000s notable for their fourth wall breaks, where characters give confessionals directly to the camera. Whilst Happy Endings is also a sitcom of the 2000s, it doesn't feature fourth wall breaks and it doesn't have a distinct visual or narrative style that this episode mimics. I think the decision to make this the into sequence is the writers fourth wall breaking to us; looking right at the camera and letting us know that whilst they're giving this episode the intro sequence from Happy Endings, a happy ending is so far from what Wanda is going to get. We can see this in the intro sequence itself, which is the first to not feature Vision at all. This entire episode is pretty much us watching Wanda slide headfirst into depression as she figuratively and quite literally watches her world slowly fall apart.

Wanda's energy for this entire episode is pretty much of that meme where the dog is sat at the table in a room on fire, saying 'This is fine'.

Gurl. It's so not fine.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

A lot in WandaVision hasn't made sense or been made that clear. I mean, shit. We're 7 episodes in and there's still a whole bunch of unanswered questions. But the one thing we do know is that the catalyst for WandaVision is Wanda's grief of losing Vision; one additional thing that Wanda's lost in a list of things, which include her brother. Yeah, that dude that showed up last week was not Pietro at all. Condolences to those of you who really thought that was Quicksilver from the FoX-verse. But I tried to tell y'all it wasn't him and that Marvel was punking everybody.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

Every episode of WandaVision so far has been Wanda doing her best to live the happy life with Vision and keep up the façade. But here, Wanda is over it. A bitch is exhausted from having to keep up appearances. And now that she knows that Vision knows this world he's living in isn't real, she's like 'What's even the fucking point?'. The Wanda we see in this episode is completely defeated. But more than that, she's also completely depressed. Gurl, same. 

This is one of the first times we see Wanda let her guard down, just not give a fuck, and stew in that for a minute. We slowly started to see Wanda drop her guard in episode 5, especially around Agatha Agnes, something she pays for by the end of the episode. But whilst Wanda is clearly depressed, she's not depressed or concerned about THE thing. Wanda is depressed because Vision isn't there with her, and his actions caused her to do something that she didn't want to have to do. She probably feels that Vision doesn't appreciate the trouble she's gone to for him, but then, how could he when his life in Westview is all that he knows? Wanda is confronting a situation within a sitcom and still using the set-up as a buffer from facing the real issues, which is that a big ass organisation on the outside know that Westview is trapped in a bubble and that the director of it wants Vision alive, with no regard for her life. Then there's the matter of whatever brought Vision to life not enabling him to leave. Wanda knows Vision can't live outside of the Hex, but also knows the Hex is under threat and can't stay up forever. Everything around Wanda is coming down around her, which we see manifesting in her home, as things within it become unstable and glitch through time periods - something we actually got a taste of with the Hex expansion in the previous episode. I wondered why so much stuff that was getting re-written by the hex was more 60s than 90s and 2000s, but didn't think much of it at the time until this episode. Wanda's mental state is affecting the Hex, and she's burying her head in the sand and reacting to the sitcom issue of her falling out with her husband, and not the real world issue that she and Vision's lives are in danger. And the life of her children are about to be in danger too. And this is all snowballing because of THE thing, which is that Wanda refused to accept Vision's death in the first place.

No matter how much you try and run from grief, that shit will catch up wit'cho ass. Grief's got stamina. 

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

As has been the case for the past couple of episodes, Billy and Tommy are very much aware and in-tune with what's happening around them, even if they can't yet make complete sense of it. Billy and Tommy are both concerned about their mother's behaviour, their father not being home, where their uncle is and what he meant by 'It's not like your dead husband can die twice'. All of this is to once again show that Billy and Tommy aren't as synced to this fabricated reality as other people in it are, and as a result they continue to throw Wanda off. She clearly loves them, but they are her blind spots. And they are still just kids. They only really start caring about things seeming weird when their Wii controllers glitch into GameCube controllers, an Atari joystick and then a set of UNO cards. COME ON PRODUCT PLACEMENT. Billy also remarks that things are too noisy in his head, which is probably him picking up Wanda's thoughts, or a result of the additional inhabitants in Westview as a result of Wanda's Hex expansion. It's also noted that Billy and Tommy very clearly have two completely different personalities which aligns with their powers. Tommy isn't very observant, where as Billy is. He can not only see something is wrong, but he can feel it too. When Agnes conveniently stops by and offers to babysit, Billy is hesitant to leave out of concern for his mother, exclaiming 'Who is going to take care of you?'.

The interesting thing with Wanda's interactions with her kids is that it's one of the few, if not only relationships that Wanda has in the Hex that's honest. In episode 5 she told Billy and Tommy not to run from the feeling of pain when their dog Sparky died was killed, despite Wanda running away from that feeling herself. And in this episode she's very blunt about how she feels, how she sees things, and her takes on life in general, which are dark, but very real.

I've said it before (I think), and I'mma say it again (or for the first time). Billy and Tommy are key in this story. They will either play huge parts in the Westview Hex being stopped, the magical villain getting their way, or being the trigger which sets off Wanda to give us the lead-in to Doctor Strange and the Multiverse of Madness. We know that WandaVision is the setup for Doctor Strange 2, and I think we're going to see the event which explains why the film has the title that it does. And whatever that event is, it's not going to be pretty. Wanda is going to lose EVERYTHING.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

Vision was last seen lying in the middle of a field following his breach of the barrier to Wanda's Animal Crossing village and that's exactly where we find him. We see that the S.W.O.R.D circus is in full swing, with that S.W.O.R.D goon who was rude to Dr. Darcy in episode 4 and then chained her to a car and left her in episode 6 as a Circus Strong-Man. He approaches Vision thinking that he's a new clown recruit who he directs to the fellow new circus recruit; The Escape Artist otherwise known as Dr. Darcy, who is still chained to a car as part of her Houdini act. Whilst this is a very clever interpretation of why Dr. Darcy is chained to a car, I am a little disappointed that we didn't get Darcy introduced as a maid in a diner, in reference to the sitcom she was most known for, 2 Broke Girls .

Vision remembers Dr. Darcy from the night before when he almost died as a result of leaving the Hex, and then does his magic finger trick to awaken her. When Dr. Darcy confirms who she is, Vision remembers her name from the e-mail he received in episode 5, and says that he has a bunch of questions, and Dr. Darcy says she has answers. The two then hop in a truck and drive back to the town centre, during which Dr. Darcy fills Vision in on everything. And I mean EVERYTHING. She even goes way back into explaining that Vision is part J.A.R.V.I.S and part Ultron. And the details of what happened between him, Wanda and Thanos in Wakanda. I really wanna know how civilians who weren't in Wakanda or at the Avengers compound know details of what happened there during the battles with Thanos. Who was there with the camera phone!?

HENNYWAY.

This info dump Vision is getting provides a very interesting moment, because it dawns on you, and seemingly Vision, that he's never really been in control of his own life. In every iteration of his existence, it's always been to serve a purpose other than this own. Before it was Tony Stark. Then it was The Avengers. Then it was to save the world. Then it was Wanda. And I imagine that Vision's greater purpose in this story will be the liberation of Westview, and liberation of himself from S.W.O.R.D and even from Wanda. 

Food for thought.

The journey takes a while because of red lights and strategically timed road works, which Vision assumes is Wanda being petty and fucking up his journey home. But we later realise it was probably some other bitch with powers.

[Looks directly into the camera]

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

As Dr. Darcy starts bringing Vision up to speed, he starts to gain an understanding of why Wanda did what she did. It's not clear at this point how he feels about Wanda in light of all of this information. And despite Dr. Darcy telling him that the love she saw between them during her binges of WandaVision was real, Vision is probably still going to wrestle with how real his love for Wanda is. But Vision is still Vision, even if he has no lived experience of all that happened before. So regardless, he knows that he is still Wanda's husband and still a father to Billy and Tommy, and he gains an increasing urgency to return back home. This bitch flies off and leaves Dr. Darcy in the truck. What is it with people just leaving Dr. Darcy!? She risked her life to try and save his ass (as feeble as the attempt was) and gave him knowledge of his life before Westview. The least he could do was Clark and Lois her ass back to the crib.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

This shit is wild, but this is a post on a show about a witch who fucks a robot who can alter his own density. So I'mma say it. There's something about Vision in this episode y'all. Vision had a swagger. The way he did those confessionals. The way he looked into the camera. There were certain shots where I was like 'Oh, he's handsome'.

I really need this lockdown to end. 'Cos I'm really sat here finding a purple robot handsome.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

Acting Motherfucker of S.W.O.R.D Tyler Hayward features in this episode for all of 15 seconds, but that's all it takes for him to show us, once again, that he's a piece of shit. He says 'Make sure the team has everything they need. We launch today'. Which we can assume is a full on assault on Westview to retrieve Vision by any means necessary. But what I find to be a more interesting take-out from this moment is that it comes with a first look of the Hex in wide shot from a distance, where we can see that it's domed over the top. I don't know why this stuck out to me, but it did. I guess I just subliminally assumed the barrier was just vertically indefinite. But the Hex being domed makes obvious sense, given that the passage of time, and day cycles inside of it run different to the outside, which could only happen if it were completely contained. So, yeah. Westview is inside the Crystal Maze and Hayward is still a cunt.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

As for what Hayward's project Cataract was, we get confirmation of it, and that it involved bringing Vision back online - something that we all guessed. I mean...Cataract? Vision? Hayward experimenting on him, then doing all sorts of shit to get him back? He is absolutely trying to weaponise him. Also, Ultron has been mentioned one too many times in WandaVision to such a point where I wonder if he will come back, or if it's just the show hammering home that Ultron is basically what Hayward wants to turn Vision into. This would add another layer as to why Wanda broke Vision's remains out of S.W.O.R.D. Not only would weaponising Vision mean her husband being turned into some type of Sentinel, which would mean he'd be turned on Wanda, but it would also be the revival of her brother's killer and the destroyer of her home. As much as it had seemed that all of Wanda's supressed grief was for Vision dying, it's become clear that Wanda still very much grieves Pietro. It's a little tragic that the thing that killed her brother is why Vision, a person she loves dearly and has done some serious shit for, exists in the first place.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

Given how things were unfolding for Monica, and the speed at which they were, I figured that maybe WandaVision would be an origin story for Monica 'the actress formerly known as Geraldine' Rambeau getting her powers, as opposed to Captain Marvel 2. And, yep. It was. It is. And it happened in the scene I pretty much said it would. Monica's little Hex proof buggy wasn't shit. The barrier chewed half of it up and spat it out, with Monica barely getting out of the damn thing in time. So of course she said 'Fuck this shit' and just ran into the damn barrier, which gave us what has to be one of the most amazing looking scenes I've seen in any film or TV show in a while. We literally see various version of Monica being pulled from her as she tries to traverse the barrier. The whole entire time we can hear conversations Monica had from the first Captain Marvel movie with her mother Maria, Nick Fury and Carol Danvers, pretty much the same clips we heard faintly at the start of episode 4 when we saw Monica being un-blipped. This whole field breach and powers acquisition scene felt very Fantastic Four-ish, which I'm sure was 100% intentional, given that The Fantastic Four is confirmed to be coming to the MCU, and that Monica would likely know them or will know them. But it's also the writers of the show doing that thing they always do; playing on the theories that they know many will have made based on a moment in a previous episode. Marvel knew full well that Monica's mention of an Aerospace Engineer would have Reed Richards thrown into the mix as a popular, if not THE most popular choice as to who Monica texted. So they said 'We're not going to give them the Fantastic Four reveal they want in this moment. But we are gon' give them some Fantastic Four type shit'.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

The great thing about this power origin story, aside from it looking fucking amazing, is that it speaks so much to what we know of Monica as a character. She made a choice about undergoing whatever crossing through the barrier a third time would do to her, as opposed to being the victim of an accident which then gives her powers. Monica is in charge of her own destiny, as much as destiny will allow.

Monica is selfless in her pursuit of what she feels is right for the greater good, and is empathetic to other people - even if it means disobeying orders and putting her own life in danger. She is everything that a hero should be. But she is also everything that Wanda isn't right now. Monica seeks the truth and stares it in the face, even if it's hard for her to do. By comparison, Wanda wants a lie, and refuses to face the truth, because this is easier for her to do. This is what makes Monica and Wanda's face off so weighty, because Monica, once again, is confronting Wanda with the truth and she's refusing to accept it, and responding with violence. First she sent Monica flying out of her house for mentioning Pietro, and then she had the nerve to try and slam Monica into the ground for mentioning Vision, but she ain't know Monica ain't a regular bitch no mo'. She's Photon / Spectrum now. (I hope they go with Spectrum, it sounds cooler). So we get Monica's first big superhero landing and an instance of her using her powers. And Wanda, for the first time, looks shook at the realisation that she's gone and made yet another mistake. But with Monica being the bigger woman, she still squares up to Wanda. She slow walks up to her and says 'DO IT BITCH. KILL ME! I FUCKING DARE YOU.' Well. Those aren't her exact words. But Monica shows that she's not scared of Wanda and tells her as such, in addition to sharing that she's also lost somebody close to her. Monica's words seem to land, just as they did when she last spoke to Wanda when they met face to face just outside the Hex in episode 5.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

Wanda knows Monica isn't the enemy. But surrendering to that means that this bubble she's in will have to pop, and she isn't ready for that yet. And Agnes who sees Monica and Wanda's lil' conversation from her window steps in and intervenes, taking Wanda away. Wanda thinks Agnes is her home girl, but she's about to see that she's is absolutely not, and that she shoulda listened to Monica instead of try'na throw that bitch all about the place.

She 'bout to learn that you should listen to Black women.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

When Wanda goes into Agnes' house she soon realises that things seem off. Agnes' house isn't glitching as Wanda's was. And she seems to wander how Agnes has a rabbit and where the hell a cicada came from. It's not just children that seem scarce in Westview, but animals and creatures too. Also, the décor doesn't seem specific to the current period that the sitcom is in. But most importantly, Billy and Tommy aren't around. When Wanda asks where they are, Agnes tells Wanda that they're probably playing in the basement, and then things turn Stranger Things and Sabrina REAL fast. As Wanda goes into the basement, the aspect ratio shifts letting us know that this is some real shit now, and things turn creepy. Then we get the reveal that many of us have all been waiting for. Agnes has herself some powers too. She's a witch bitch. And her real name is Agatha Harkness.

The reveal was very Disney villain-esque, which may put some people off. But I was living. If you're gonna play a witch and a villain, then ham it up. But the name reveal was important, because Agatha Harkness is a character from comics, who has a history with Scarlet Witch. Also, the name reveal is, yet again, the writers winking to all of the people who said from before the first episode even aired that Agnes was really Agatha Harkness. This is a theory that's stuck and had corroborative ground in each episode, because of things Agnes does, says, and a general feeling that she seems far more aware of what's happening than your regular Westview residents LONG before episode 6. This theory was almost treated like fact due to the certainty of it. And look. The Internet was right.

But the reveal wasn't just a regular reveal, which is what made it so amazing.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

Off the back of the Disney villain reveal, we get a title sequence which is a parody of the opening sequence to The Munster's complete with its own theme song "Agatha All Along", where we see a montage of Agatha causing mischief behind the scenes of numerous WandaVision episodes - confirming that Wanda is not the only person in control of things in Westview. In episode 5 when Vision confronted her about Norm, Wanda had said she didn't know what Vision was on about and that she wasn't in control of all of the residents in Westview, and I believed her. The bigger question is how did all of this start, something which Wanda doesn't seem to know. And why Agatha seemed to need Wanda despite being a powerful witch herself. The Agatha reveal was one thing, but there's still a whole bunch of questions. Agatha clearly has a mastery of her powers, and has the means to manipulate people, which raises several questions that we already had, but in a slightly different context. Who actually Hexed the Westview residents and why? Did Agnes have a hand in how all of this Hex foolishness started? Why did Agnes need Wanda? Who brought Vision back from the dead? Why does Wanda not seem to have such a selective memory? Why sitcoms? Will Agatha give Wanda the name Scarlet Witch? Where are the kids!?

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

A popular villain theory for WandaVision was the Marvel Devil Mephisto, who could still be involved in this somehow. But with there only being two episodes left, I can't see the show giving us another villainous reveal when we already have Hayward and Agatha; unless it's a character who we've already been introduced to. The jury is still out on if Ralph is a real person we'll actually see, and who Agent Woo's informant in witness protection is, and if they're even as big a deal as many have made them out to be. We've not had a bad bitch, campy villain in the MCU since Hela in Thor: Ragnarok (who absolutely deserves to come back) and Kathryn Hayn is so damn good, that I would be very okay with her being the villain behind everything. I just hope she isn't killed off, because it'd be such a waste to not leave the door open for Kathryn Hayn to return. Although Wanda does kill her in the comics. Then again, everybody ends up dead in the comics at some point.

BUT. I do believe that we may get a nod or a hint to Agatha maybe serving a higher being, or co-conspiring with one - in order to set up a future show, film or larger arc to go across phase 4. If it does turn out that there's another villain in the mix, I don't think they'll be the presiding bad guy in this story. I think Agnes is going to be the local villain, with another powerful magic user being the big bad main villain for a story to come. I'm really looking forward to a big ol' witch off in the finale though. How these two will fight is going to be of a wildness level that we've only seen in Doctor Strange, and a little of in Infinity War. I hope it's crazy as fuck. And with this show having the same budget and visual effects resource as any MCU film, shit could get real nuts. If they just have these bitches have some little scrap in this raggedy lair, I will be so pissed.

Talkin' some shit about... WandaVision - Episode 7 / WandaVision Review | Yes. Everything is Rubbish. By Random J

This was another great episode of WandaVision. It felt much slower than episode 6, but I think it's because of the sitcom style which feels far more expositional than the Malcom in the Middle style of storytelling. But a lot did happen. Despite Monica gaining her powers, Vision finding out all of his own tea and the Agnes reveal, the real focus here was Wanda's depression, and how she's at a point now where she can no longer run. Her world is literally coming apart at the seams. There's no more show to put on for Vision. Too many people have unwillingly become a part of her lie. And now she has somebody who is set to threaten the life of her and her children, whilst somebody else threatens that of her husband.

Seeing Wanda struggle with keeping it together and giving up was a big switch for the character, which is so at odds with how we've seen her for the past 5 weeks. The sitcom guise also affords Marvel to really go dark with Wanda, whilst keeping it light. It's a clever ruse. But I do hope that Marvel don't shy from the darkness in the stories that they tell. Not everything is sunshine lollipops and rainbows, and so many of the stories in the Marvel Comics are dark. And Wanda's story has been one of the darkest told in the MCU thus far. Much like Wanda herself, Marvel can't keep running from very real shit. 

Marvel Studios always seem to allude to trauma in their stories, but never really delve into it. It's often brushed off. I always think of a movie like Endgame, where we saw the effects of PTSD on characters such as Tony Stark, Black Widow and Thor, but it was just for the sake of a moment. It never went deeper. Even in WandaVision, we don't see Monica really process her mother's death and it seems to be for the sole purpose of showing somebody cope with it the polar opposite to how Wanda is, when it's not that simple. And this is the issue I have. Marvel Studios always simplify trauma. So I really hope that Marvel are not afraid to really go there in the final two episodes and throughout the current MCU phase. They've gotta be longer than 20 - 25 minutes though. I can't see how they'd wrap this shit up in two 20 minute episodes. Then again, if any show can do it...

📒 My Episode notes
  • "Agatha All Along" deserves to be number 1 on the Billboard Hot 100
  • The Hula woman on the Funnel Cake dash was totally an Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D reference
  • Where are Billy and Tommy?
  • Where are all of the Westview kids!?
  • Where did the Westview kids come from in the first place!!?
  • Are Hayward and Agnes fucking?
  • The Darkhold book looks different to how it did in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D
  • Wanda really tried kill Monica during Black History Month
  • The scene with Monica traversing the barrier - give the VFX and sound team the awards

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